This is it, what we’ve been building up to! Wow – I over-egged that a little. There was no real build up, was there? And this is a pay-off? Poor reader.
Anyway – Avengers Assemble. I just had to have a picture of the delightful Black Widow in here somewhere, she stole the show if I’m being honest. It appears she is being interrogated in her fantastic introductory scene, but in actual fact, she is interrogating the men who appear to have her held captive – it’s genius. Scarlett Johansson’s character once again shines through when she is sent to gain the services of a certain Mr Banner, and then again in a genuinely exciting chase scene opposite the same man, albeit when he is a lot bigger, stronger, angrier and greener. My expectations were once again turned against me when Loki was trying to get inside her head – it turns out she was probing him for information. I never saw that coming, even though she played the same trick earlier in the film. She was my favourite part of Avengers Assemble, not just because she’s nice to look at, but also because the Black Widow was incredibly well written.
Now, on to the rest.
Tom Hiddleston was once again fantastic in the role of Loki – really playing up his mischievous nature. He delivered the best insult I think I’ve ever heard – calling the Black Widow a “mewling quim”. That could be construed by some as actually quite offensive, as it’s pretty much one step away from calling a lady a whinging cunt – I’m amazed they got it past the censors. Also, Loki kicked more ass in his first five minutes in Avengers Assemble than in the entirety of Thor, and I was totally entertained when Hulk bounced him around. Great scene. Speaking of Bruce Banner, I felt Mark Ruffalo portrayed him very well. A little paranoid, a little nervous, he really doesn’t want the Hulk to get out. How Bruce seems to have control over the Hulk persona could’ve been explained better – one moment he’s a force of nature, smashing everyone and everything he can see, then an hour later he’s amicably standing around with the rest of the Avengers, grunting and tensing in a dramatic team pose. While I felt Thor was only there because his brother Loki was the antagonist, he did get to have a couple of cool fights. All the confrontations that the team had before they properly became Avengers were quite fun, and also served as one of the reasons which showed us why Captain America is the boss – he broke up the fights, and organised the group of individuals into a team.
In his third outing as Iron Man, Robert Downey Jr was once again on form – his scientific rapport with Bruce was very amusing. Hawkeye was kinda meh, brainwashed for the first half of the film, shooting arrows at generic Alpha Bravos in increasingly contrived ways in the second half. Nick Fury warrants a mention, as this is the first film he does anything worthy of a mention: he shoots his gun a few times. Were the bad guys meant to be Skrulls? They had similar chins to Skrulls. I must admit, I am unfamiliar with the Chitauri. Still, they got their asses kicked in a variety of creative ways, and their giant war-machines were pretty cool. Thanos appearing at the end was an unexpected surprise, and bodes well for an Infinity Gauntlet style sequel.
It was just a massive spectacle of a film, and a massive success in my eyes. I hate to say this, but it was better than any of the X-Men films, and I was a huge X-Men fan back in the day. It does really pain me to write that, but on the other hand, Avengers Assemble was just incredible.
What’s next? Iron Man 3 I think, isn’t it?
